I have long been finding perfect notebooks for my own writing habits. I keep several sketchbooks and notebooks in one time because I have too many thoughts running on and on and on. They are all supposed to write down, to clear up the space in my head. Lately, I discovered that I am addicted to writing, to pour down all my thoughts on to a physical thing – paper. Putting everything in Evernote and computer makes me crazy. Not being able to write for few days make me feel suffocated. Writing down – for me it’s like talking to myself, like one would empty a trash every Monday or manage their laptop storage every Thurs. It really helps me to slow down and ready to fill up when new things flooding in my brain.
This time before the end of the year is a perfect moment to really review and reflect what had happened in my 2014. There were a lot of accomplishments , as well as disappointments and failures. All over the year, I had made trips to 8 new cities, which are all wonderful. Some unexpected, remarkable victories are the fact that I got in the MA Textiles at Royal College of Art, London. Although failed for the first scholarship offered by the college, I finally attempted and won the scholarship for South-East Asian students from CIMB Bank, Malaysia. All of these ups and downs undoubtedly made 2014 one of the greatest year in my life, so far.
Remember why I started what I love?
It started out naturally since my childhood. I remember myself doodling on the walls and on every pages of notebooks and drawing books even they were blank or not. I love drawing girls and clothes and animals and nature and not mechanic or manmade things.
When I grow up, I love drawing and painting because it was what I’m good at. You always like to do something you’re good at, right? I won an award and was a representative from my school to compete in a contest between schools. And that was nothing about fashion. I loved dressing up myself but knew nothing about this world until I stepped in when I was in my late 10s. I never really know how choosing fashion design instead of industrial design and architect could have changed my life this much. If I can turn back time, I still could not answer how much things will be different from my life now. But I’m happy with it anyway.
In 2009, I had an overwhelming inspiration and ambition but no place to collect them all in. So I started blogging as my online journal and diary. Since then, Vanillawalk has been carefully built up with an archive of my amateur artworks, interests, and influences. It was a space of my own life, things I found on my pathway to my goals. I see my life as a long, slow, full-of-aesthetics journey, that’s why I name this site ‘vanillawalk’. Imagine a walkway full of vanilla scented, you are walking in distance, searching for big dreams but never forget to enjoy small things on sides. That’s what my life used to be.
So Who am I now? I think the most important part of being in today’s world loaded with information, is to stay true to your inner self. I knew sometimes I get lost and out of my track but I am constantly gaining pieces of myself back. I know who I am : passionate, strong, and independent. Solitude is my thing, and my aspiration is to create ‘a world of my own’ again.
Remember why I started ? Yes. I love storytelling. My only cup of tea is to tell stories through my works, even the mediums are words, photos, poems, textures, or surfaces of clothing I created. Fashion and trends mean nothing to me because I am not doing it for commercial. I see fashion as clothing, as a piece of art. It’s something I love to do and want to tell a story of who I am. In my every projects, you can see the concepts, the stories, and hidden beauty that I tried to unveil.
The suffering part is that, I have just graduated, and just stepped in a realistic side of fashion industry. Eventually I have learnt that fashion is business, which I enjoy anyway but also starve for imagination. How could I mix both creative and commercial together? That’s a challenge.
P.S. Remember who you are
_ Maybe people admire social network as their virtual society
Since it helps them express their feelings to those with no familiarity
We do not see real ‘faces’ through screen clarity
Met those..whom you dare not to talk to.. in a reality
me, in the dawn of October 2
Artistic 2D skills
Artistic 3D skills
Assertiveness = states point of view clearly, stands by beliefs
Business acumen = numerate, able to spot opportunities, aware of costs/benefits, logical
Commitment = prepared to go to the extra mile, works hard, open to learning
Flair = makes hardwork seems effortless, good grooming, chic
Humility = The ability to ask for help, admit weakness, know limitations
Initiative = starts things and solves problems by doing- not thinking
Passion for fashion
Perception = a quick eye, graphic skills, troubleshooting and intellectual skills
Risk-taking = daring, forecasting and enterpreneurial skills
Temperament = Friendly, even-tempered, calm
and the list goes on…